Sometimes You Just Have to Deal

One of the very best sermons I ever heard was from an 8(?) year old girl and was only one sentence long.  She said, "Sometimes you just have to deal."

She was right.  You may not want to, you may try not to, but sometimes, my friends, you just have to deal.  As in deal with whatever it is that life has thrown your way.  The key, I suppose, is how we deal.  Last week President Dieter F Uchtdorf  put it this way,

"Everyone’s situation is different, and the details of each life are unique. Nevertheless, I have learned that there is something that would take away the bitterness that may come into our lives. There is one thing we can do to make life sweeter, more joyful, even glorious.

We can be grateful!

It might sound contrary to the wisdom of the world to suggest that one who is burdened with sorrow should give thanks to God. But those who set aside the bottle of bitterness and lift instead the goblet of gratitude can find a purifying drink of healing, peace, and understanding."

I don't know too much about the goblet of gratitude (I tend more towards the cookie jar of comfort) but I have learned a thing or two about the attitude of gratitude.  

1.  Attitude matters.  Mosiah 24: 15 says the people of Alma did "submit cheerfully and with patience to all the will of the Lord."  When it comes down to it, we all have to submit to something (see, above--sometimes you just have to deal) but cheerfully and patiently are optional.  They are also pretty tough to do sometimes.  

In our family, we refer to this verse as "the brain tumor" verse.  We decided to take the Lord up on the challenge that if we were cheerful and patient, he would strengthen our backs so we would not feel the burdens.  Turns out there was a lot to be cheerful about with a brain tumor--like the fact that it was 1994 not 1894, or that Exxon had one of the premiere insurance plans in the country (brain surgery for $5 copay--score!).  Also, the looks on people's faces when you told them.  The neighbors and friends who helped and prayed, the parents that came and stayed.  The young man in our Violent  Valiant 11 class who fasted for me. 

Patience also played a role--but it was much easier to be patient when we were cheerful.  I often say, you haven't lived until you've had to have you mother-in-law help you to the bathroom.  Patience with learning to walk un-assisted. Patience in trying to get your body to move correctly.  I am still working on that--I am excited for the resurrection to get my nerves back in working order, though it does make for some amusing and clumsy moments here.  

2.  It's not a surprise to the Lord.  It may be to you--Surprise!-- but it isn't to the Lord. 

As many of you know, our 17 year old has been suffering from terrible and chronic migraines.  Those of you who have not had a migraine are thinking, "that's too bad" and those if you with migraine experience are clutching your heads and weeping.   Besides the pain (she says casually) his whole life has shut down.  We had to withdraw him from school and put him on home study.  He has been to church once in the last two months.  As the doctors work with him everything takes time (patience).  In fact, if you really want practice with patience, get yourself admitted to the hospital--and then try and get discharged.  Took us 8 hours to get discharged because so many doctors had to sign off.  

So Thomas's life is not going according to our plan.  But it is going according to The Plan.  It wasn't a surprise to the Lord that Thomas would go through this.  As surprising as it is to us, we are sure, absolutely sure, that for whatever reason this is the plan for Thomas--and we just have to deal. So we are dealing.  Maybe someday we will be able to see more clearly what the blessings are from this, but until then we are confident that there are blessings.  Some are obvious (modern painkillers, anyone?) some are tender (helping a sick child) and some are amazing (hearing Thomas talk about the peace he has felt through the whole ordeal).  

Patience and Cheerfulness.  Gratitude not bitterness.  

Maybe someday I'll relate this concept to missionaries and their struggles, but it looks like Tom's medicine has just kicked in and he is once again vertical.  I think this calls for a cookie.